Ryan is back in class today for the first time in over month and I find myself falling apart and my heart is hurting so badly today. I truly loved our weekends with him. I want Ryan home and I want Landry with us. At this moment I am longing for Heaven.....
Sometimes the pain is so strong and the tears just flow. I was trying to think if there are any other triggers that are making today so hard and I came up with a few: Birthday Party this afternoon for a close friend. Ever since Landry, Birthday Parties have been really hard, maybe it is seeing all the families together and knowing in my heart that there is someone missing. They are just hard and I never really feel like myself when we are there, and this family attends a lot of parties these days. Monday is Landry's 6 month Birthday. I can't believe how fast it is going... I am having a hard time grasping 6 months. Well, I guess there are always triggers when you loose a child.
Well, it is time to put on my big girl face and prepare the rest of our day.
Park City Utah
2 years ago
3 comments:
Love you more than words can say!!! Praying for you today and everyday!!! <3
I also find birthday parties hard. The happy birthday song often makes me want to cry. Maybe it's because we will never get to sing it to our babies? Or maybe it's seeing everyone happy when inside we are so sad? I am not sure but I totally get what you are feeling.
I know it was hard for you to be there and we appreciate it so much that you were. You are such a good friend! Love you!
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