This Week

Tyler has been sick since Tuesday so I have been spending a lot time cuddling a little boy that is usually to busy to cuddle so I have been taking advantage of our "cuddle days". A part of me has really enjoyed our sick days at home but then apart me realized how much my arms have ached for Landry.
I have always hated when Ty is sick but this time the feelings have been harder. It is amazing the affects of burying a child have on you. I am a different person in the way I view things.... However, I am ok with that.
Tyler has been waking up in the middle of the night and last night as we were watching Curious George at 2am waiting for the medicine to kick in I realized how nice it felt that someone needed me in the middle of the night... But my heart also ached thinking that I should be awake with Landry.... When ever you are expecting a baby you are consumed with not getting any sleep and when you come home with out your little one that was supposed to be waking up because they needed you it is hard to go to sleep a night knowing that you will not hear the cry of a hungry baby... So last night when a little boy needed me it made me feel wanted but it was also a reminder that someone is missing.
Ty had a better today but we will be hanging low again tomorrow. As much as I love the cuddles I want my biggest back, because then I will know that everything is ok.